Anyone who knows me in real life would probably describe me as feisty. I've noticed throughout my life that people like to use adjectives to describe me that are quite similar to those used to describe a terrier. Loyal but tenacious and sassy, lovable but stubborn. Definitely feisty.
Living through this particular period in history is not easy for us feisty people. It's hard not to get pissed off by all the shenanigans today, in particular in the U.S. I try desperately to avoid discussing politics on this blog, but today's topic is less about the piss-poor state of our country, thanks to Shitler (Oops, sorry). It's more around how the constant onslaught of it impacts my life.
Actually, it's about how I allow it to impact my life. My brain, my choice, but more on that later.
Studies show that talking out loud eases mental anxiety and strife because your brain recognizes its own voice, so talking through things verbally actually does help calm your brain. Here's a Time article on it. This one was an easy one to adopt because I've always talked to myself.
Often, Laura, my daughter, will hear these conversations from downstairs. Sometimes things get heated. I like to do color commentary when watching the news on my SONOS device in my kitchen, and add helpful comments like, "Oh, you would say that, you lying sack of shit!" That could be directed at multiple players at this point, but you get the picture.
Safe to say that my Alexa could definitely sue me for emotional abuse, as a lot of my ire is often misdirected at her when she doesn't understand me. I often hear, "Here's what I found on the web, Jesus Christ was the son of...." which, of course, just cues up my next angry outburst.
One day, I found this account on Instagram that focuses on using real medical principles, like neuroscience, to explain how to overcome various physical or mental struggles (grief, menopause, anxiety, etc.). Michael Hunter, an author, runs the account and has a background in eastern medicine. Anyway, what he said in regards to anger really made sense.
In this video, he talks about the anger algorithm, and I realized, I have that! He explains how you inadvertently "feed" your anger algorithm by doing seemingly innocuous activities like WATCHING THE NEWS!! Sorry, that might have been a bit of a social commentary on the pathetic state of affairs these days, but what I realized is that all my social media has adjusted to my anger algorithm and is spoon-feeding me anger-inducing content throughout the day.
He couldn't have been more right. I have been inadvertently feeding my anger without really knowing I was doing it. Perhaps the non-Terriers of the world can watch the news, read the articles, and not get enraged, but I know it is very hard for me to do so. And, let's face it: it's hard to even focus on one thing to be angry at. It almost consumes me trying to keep track ot it.
Blame old age, perimenopausal brain fog, or just a shitty memory, but I'm having trouble keeping track of everything that's going on. We are getting scandal-bombed at such a pace that it's nearly impossible to stay focused on just one offense.
The greatest thing is that he teaches ways to trick your own brain and nervous system to rewire itself and focus on positive things in your life. Such great advice, and yes, I am going to try these.
In this video, he actually talks about how constant anger actually impacts the hippocampus and can basically "fry your brain." I don't know about you, but I'm operating at diminished mental capacity to begin with, so any degradation is best avoided.
The bottom line is, though, I can vote, protest, donate, and share my views on politics, but I can't go down the anger spiral. I will continue to make sure my daughter (and neices when in ear shot) are aware of the changes that are happening and why they should NOT be okay with them. I know Laura really appreciates the lectures. 🤣
Rewiring the algorithm
Once a terrier, always a terrier, but I am going to try some of these mental exercises, but I also need to double-down-(dog 😉) on yoga as it always help to still my mind and relieve a lot of the physical tension that creeps up throughout the day.
It's hard to focus on other things right now. I hear that "Special News Alert" music and I feel an absolute sense of panic. Again. But, I'm committed to not letting it get the best of me.
I think the tide has turned and things will improve. Signs are there, so I am moving forward hoping the worst is behind us. Who's in?
Spring is right around the corner. I've already played outside tennis this year. It's not dark at 4 pm anymore. Alright, enough with the positivity, you get it.
Forge on, my friends.
Feisty Barb
Miss any blogs?
