Hello and happy holidays to everyone! Can't believe we are about to turn the page on 2021. I definitely think as you get older, the years seem to pass so much faster. Probably because once you are officially over the hill, gravity takes over and the ride gets faster. Makes sense.
My closer friends know that I'm not a huge Christmas person; the word "Grinch" has been thrown around from time to time. I strongly disagree with that label however. The week before Christmas, I'm hella jolly as the week leading up to Christmas should be festive, but blaring Christmas tunes in October at Target or Walmart is a big NO for me. No one wants to have a pre-holiday anxiety attack in an aisle at Walmart!!!
I will also admit that I have not put up a Christmas tree since I moved out of our house in Ohio, almost 7 years ago. Just seems like a lot of hassle when we usually travel over the holiday and never have both kids home for the holiday. I don't have as much space so my decorations are also a tad sparse. I've been using the same Super Mega Giant roll of wrapping paper I bought at Costco in 2005. I can't tie a bow to save my life so my gifts are never properly bedazzled.
Now having said that, I was once known for my rather wild annual holiday party, better known as the "Big Ass" Christmas Party. Why big ass? When I first starting throwing it, we lived in a barely 1,000-sq-ft house, our first, so having even a modestly sized party was fun but problematic. For one, everyone would want to hang out in my extremely small, galley-style kitchen, rendering me completely useless, unable to open the oven, open the refrigerator, or wash dishes. Made me absolutely nuts!
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| Even Barbie had fun. |
So when we eventually moved to a larger house, with a huge kitchen that opened to the family room, I could invite as many people as I wanted and I did, eventually morphing into the "Big-Ass" Christmas Party with 100+ guests, although typically not at the same time. My party became the "last stop" party of the night since it always competed with other holiday and office parties (remember those?). Translation: a lot of late guests in very festive moods, i.e. pre-marinated.
Perhaps that was one of the contributing factors, but it definitely had a rap for being a rather crazy night. I mean just having a swear word on the invite was enough to pique the curiosity of all of our respective kids, who, of course, were banned from the event. One of my invites on the inside listed reasons you should attend and one was "You feel wicked just saying it!" and another was "Cut loose in Avon's only subterranean disco." Oh yes, there was dancing.
The Christmas Ale Poisoning
One year we decided it might be fun to serve a keg of Great Lakes Christmas Ale. We were aware it was a bit more boozy than typical keg beer, but we certainly could not have foreseen what happened next. Typically these parties go quite late into the night so at 10 pm, the party is literally just getting warmed up. That year, however, I started noticing people leaving way earlier than normal.
Across the room I saw my close friend and neighbor Stasia's husband with his coat on. I stepped in to protest. She shot me a rather annoyed glance and told me to go talk to him. I did and I won't lie, it wasn't pretty. I actually could make out little of what he was saying but certainly immediately realized the damage had been done and the sooner he was gone, the better.
No one was spared, except the non-beer drinkers. My ex-husband spent the last few hours holding one hard over one eye due to Christmas Ale partial blindness/double vision. Things got broken, and perhaps not surprisingly he was not a whole lot of help at the end of the night.
One by one, we lost people in what later became known as the Christmas Ale Poisoning. Faulty keg? Operator error? No need to point fingers, but the devastation was massive and amazingly swift. One of my ex's NASA colleagues threw up in the back seat of his boss' car who had driven them to the party. We had a few guests get sick in the yard. The next day, I got several phone calls from the wives of some of alleged victims. They seemed to feel it might be in the best interest of everyone to not bring back the Christmas Ale keg. It was officially banned the following year, at least in keg form.
I took a few years off after the divorce, but then brought it back with a vengeance! It felt great to know I could pull it off on my own, not just the party but life in general. Wonderful to feel the support of a boat-load of amazing friends in Cleveland who couldn't wait to bring this holiday tradition back. And, it goes without saying that this party would not have happened without the support of my friends who every year brought enough food and booze to keep the party going.
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| Notice the "No one allowed in the kitchen" disclaimer. |
The last year I held it at my house, we included the kids, most of which were college-aged at that point, and that took the soiree and related debauchery to a whole new level. But what a blast! They were thrilled to finally be part of the party they had grown up being excluded from but were quite curious about.
Missed any blogs? You can catch up with the past blogs with links below:
It's About DamnTime: Barb's First Blog
6 Tips for Working from Home
Celebrating Love Amid Dark Days
Derelict Driving and My 15 Minutes of Fame
Are We Living Through the Greatest Depression?
Why is Mother's Day a Day and Not a Week?
No-Speed Naveed and the Joys of Urban Transport
Shapewear and The Costs of Being Female
Golf, the Cruel Mistress of Summer
2021: A New Year, a New Outlook
Bidding Adieu to a Wonderful Summer
The Time Machine in the Garage
The Benefits of Being a Certain Age
There's a Sandwich in Every Beer
Remembering the Big Ass Christmas Party
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